Embracing the Suck: Lessons from Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu

Andrew’s Thoughts: Embracing the Suck

I never truly grasped the concept of embracing the suck. Growing up, I believed that success meant excelling effortlessly, avoiding discomfort at all costs. It wasn’t until I encountered a similar notion in college that the idea began to take root. A professor once remarked, “The journey is usually more important than the destination.” This statement lingered, its significance gradually unfolding in my mind.

Years later, I found myself stepping onto the mats of a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu (BJJ) gym. BJJ intrigued me not only as a means of self-defense but also as a source of structure in my post-college life, where I often felt adrift.

On my first day of BJJ class, I made a conscious decision to silence my inner doubts and dive into the training, despite the challenges it presented. It marked a stark departure from my sedentary lifestyle; I hadn’t engaged in rigorous physical activity in a decade, never having been athletically inclined.

As I grappled with the basics of BJJ, the concept of “embracing the suck” became glaringly apparent. Sweaty, exhausted, and frequently defeated, I faced the temptation to throw in the towel. Yet, something within me urged perseverance, compelling me to push through the discomfort.

In BJJ, there’s a saying: “A black belt is just a white belt that never quits.” This maxim underscores the importance of resilience, a quality I began to cultivate through countless hours of training, sparring, and enduring humbling defeats.

Despite setbacks, I gradually learned to appreciate the process—the incremental improvements, the lessons gleaned from failure, and the camaraderie forged with fellow practitioners. Each stumble on the mats became an opportunity for growth, a chance to refine my technique and bolster my resolve.

Beyond physical prowess, BJJ imparted upon me a profound lesson in resilience. In a sport rife with setbacks and inevitable defeat, I discovered the ability to rebound from failure, dust off my ego, and return to the mats with renewed determination.

This resilience extended beyond the confines of the gym, permeating every facet of my life. Empowered by newfound confidence, I tackled challenges outside the dojo with the same tenacity and grit. Whether navigating career transitions or fostering personal relationships, I approached each obstacle with purpose and resolve.

Today, as I reflect on my journey in BJJ, I am grateful for the invaluable lessons it has bestowed upon me. Embracing the suck isn’t merely about enduring hardship; it’s about embracing discomfort as a catalyst for growth and transformation.

As I navigate life’s twists and turns, I carry with me the indomitable spirit forged on the mats of my BJJ gym. The path ahead may be fraught with obstacles, but armed with courage and resilience, I face it head-on, knowing that every setback brings me one step closer to realizing my true potential.

And though I remain a proud white belt after a year and a half of training, I find solace in the journey itself, knowing that greatness is not measured by the color of one’s belt, but by the willingness to embrace the suck and keep pushing forward.

– Andrew

Kim’s Thoughts – Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn.

Nowhere is this more apparent than in my journey in Brazilian jiu-jitsu, a hobby I took up quite seriously about a year and a half ago.

Being small in stature, those first few months of BJJ were really brutal for me since I couldn’t rely on strength and size. Before BJJ, I was an avid fitness enthusiast and did Olympic lifting for a few years.

My experience in BJJ humbled me; I thought I was strong, but being submitted countless times made me think otherwise.

Over time, however, being small and unable to rely on strength proved to be a blessing in disguise, a baptism by fire if you will. I was forced to learn how to survive and defend early on in my journey. Then, little by little, slowly but surely and consistently, everything began to feel like it was clicking into place.

This feeling doesn’t last long, though. It’s followed by plateaus of varying lengths—the kind that makes you think, ‘I don’t know what the hell I’m doing,’ followed again by everything falling into place, thinking, ‘Hell yeah, I was definitely born for this shit’

I think, in that sense, there are parallels in BJJ to real life. Sometimes life feels like a breeze, then there are times when everything sucks and nothing seems to be working, in which case you just gotta roll with the punches.

I think when those moments come, it’s helpful to come back to the question of why. Why are you doing this? What’s your why? Why is this important to you?

To me, BJJ is a tool for keeping my ego in check, while at the same time improving my self-confidence and generally becoming a better human being. Why do I do BJJ? Because it’s fun. I don’t come to class to beat people up; I come to learn and have fun rolls, and I remind myself of that at each class.

So, what does embracing the suck mean? To me, it means being okay even when things aren’t going as planned. To always have a beginner’s mindset. To maybe look like a phony doing something and yet still having fun with it. To embrace failures and setbacks as lessons and opportunities to grow rather than personal affronts to your ego.

Granted, it is much easier to say than to embrace this mindset wholeheartedly. And I assure you, those feelings of insecurity are completely normal and valid. But instead of brushing them off or sweeping them under the rug, I urge you to embrace them, acknowledge them, and own them. There is strength in admitting your own vulnerability. Let the world think you’re a phony. That is going to be irrelevant. What matters is whether you are devoting your time to working towards something that matters to you.

– Kim

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